Friday, April 25, 2008

Mommy Diaries Part VII: Bullying

High School Reunion
The 80’s song “Only the Lonely” by The Motels is playing in my office which reminded me I wanted to blog about this. The group performed this song at “the prom” on TV Land’s “High School Reunion.” (HSR)
During the second half of my maternity leave I became addicted to TV Land’s “High School Reunion.” It’s a reality show filmed over 2 weeks I believe. They pick a high school from somewhere in the country and a class that graduated 20 years ago. They bring on some “typical” superlative holders and throw them in a house in Hawaii for 2 weeks.

The one I watched aired beginning March 5th and featured the 1987 graduating class of J.J. Pearce High School in Dallas Texas. The “cast” is as follows

DeAnna- The Popular Girl
Steve- The Backstabber (slept with his best friend Mike’s wife, Lana)
Cheryl- The Outsider
Yvette- The Girl Next Door
Glenn- The Geek (bullied by Jason)
Heather- The Heartbreaker
Jason- The Bully (to Glenn)
Justin- The Pipsqueak (and super hot today I might add)
Kat- The Lesbian
Kristin- The Spoiled Girl (formerly engaged to and currently reunited with Sean)
Lana- The Drama Queen (yes, the cheater with Steve)
Rob- The Stud (though “Robbie Sparks” seems to come out easier-his full name)
Sean- The Millionaire
Matt- The Jock
Mike- The Rebel (formerly married to Lana and former best friends with Steve)

ON the outset I’d like to refer you to my “Friends” list on MySpace. Many of the cast of HSR have pages and they’re on my friends list. I’d like you to read Glenn’s Blog. He wrote a blog during the show that was on the TV land website. However, he continues his blog on his MySpace page and has an EXCELLENT blog about being bullied by Jason in high school. This HSR blog will just discuss Glenn, Jason, and bullying. I’ll blog about the rest of the show later.

When Glenn showed up to the reunion he confronted Jason. He told Jason what he did, how Jason hurt him, and demanded that Jason admit his wrongdoings and apologize in front of the rest of the gang. Jason did. He was ashamed and he and Glenn became friends outside the show once they realized how much they had in common. Glenn blogged a shocker. He said that at the end of the show (it wasn’t shown on TV) Jason had the show fly his family to Hawaii to meet Glenn. Jason explained to his boys what he did to Glenn in high school and why it was wrong. Wow…talk about a turnaround.

I was never bullied or picked on in school. If I was teased it was for always raising my hand in class. I guess my “superlative” if I were on High School Reunion would be “The Teacher’s Pet.”

While I was never picked on, my brother was. He was 3 years younger than me and, until high school, was picked on/bullied because of his weight. He would cry at night in his bedroom because he was called fat or (insert any variation here) during the school day. Just talking about it writing about it makes my blood boil. There were times where I confronted the sh*tforbrains about their actions and they nearly peed themselves. Through all of it, as far as I know, my brother never shouted a mean word back. He took it all in because he knew “two wrongs don’t make a right.” And, quite frankly, he could have caused physical damage if he wanted to.

As middle school turned in to high school, my brother reconciled formally or informally with these asses, became a class officer, and became rather popular. Fast forward- he’s about to graduate college, has had a wicked successful college career and, on yea, he’s lost like 80 pounds and is a runner.

While he appears to have let it go, there are still kids that tick me off when I see them. We are all well in to our twenties at this point and I still want to punch them in the head….I suppose I should get over it but LORD.

As a mother I realize that, in fact, the bullying at such a young age had roots with their parents. Kids at the age of 7,8,9 have no other basis for how to treat people than what they see around them in their family. Somewhere along the way they learned that it was OK to talk to and treat people that way. They didn’t make it up. My parents always taught us to treat people with respect in both actions and with our words.

Quinn will be taught the dying art of RESPECT. Respect yourself. Respect your family. Respect others.

In the face of adversity, do not cast the second stone.



Xo

Andrea

1 comment:

Brian said...

Well said! More like 90 pounds but whos counting. It's not cool making fun of people. I'll admit I make jabs at people for stupid reasons, but I follow the golden rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you". Ethics baby! Q will be as tough as the streets and smarter than Einstein, also has an Uncle who doesn't take kindly to bullies ;-)